Gia, Turns 2 in a few days

Gia Honey,

As you turn two in a few days from now, I have been grappling with my toast and I thought while I will write and raise a toast on your birthday but I am sure you would hardly remember so I am putting it in black and white for you to read when you grow up. I write this with a lot of love and to tell you how much you mean to me and you always will.

On a starry night on 7th of Jan, I first held you in my arms with a tear in my eye. I was an anxious to be father and as I see you grow I am still an anxious father and guess that would remain with me. You are this incredible burst of energy with the most mischievous, naughty and intense eyes. It's such a joy to see you even when you are screaming and bringing the roof down. Honestly I try and be calm and I know its just a phase and shall pass. I want to say sorry for all the times I have yelled at you or lost my cool. I only do that out of my limitation to understand you and keep your tantrums in check. The only intend with this is to help you grow up polite, respecting and disciplined. Love you and love you so much dear. Wish you a very happy, healthy and a great learning year ahead. Like you say LAAB YOU :)

Being Father to a One year Old

This the period of my life I reckon as the most exciting and challenging at the same time. I have been blessed with time that I can afford with my little Gia very early in her growing years and I am hoping I am able to do justice with the time that I have got. From feeding her to taking care of daily chores it has been a journey to remember.

Watching her starting to crawl to walk and now run have been moments I will always cherish. Her playful laughs, her fake laughs and the tantrums I seem to be growing with her. Every now and then I will glimpse of me as a child. Man I was a wreck for my parents I must say. In any way I write this my days have been such a bliss, oh yeah, but it is very challenging. It really takes a toll on your energy levels and on your patience. I have been praying everyday, "God give me patience", I do not want to be rude or raise my voice to this innocent little baby but it can be really trying. The problem is communication...Yes it starts this yearly...communication gap/generation gap all starts very early. They try to explain what they want to do, we dont understand what they want. We are happy as long as they do things according to our comfort and the moment there is a deviation tempers are tested.

Ironic isn't it we have all been through this and now we experience this with our kid...No wonder they say when you will have Kids you will understand what we have been through. Honestly, I am not trying to complain but just contemplate ways in which I can handle her tender years better..Yeah I know there are tons of website guiding you about ways in which you can do it better then you are...This is more self realization and also an attempt to pen down feelings that i experience today and everyday over the last few months. Some day I know when my baby will read all of this together we shall both laugh about it.

Gia Taparia, you are a bundle of joy and as I grow older with you I want to see myself grow out of being a father to becoming a friend that will be there for you whenever you need me. I wish I can be a father that you are amazingly proud of. I will try my best to do what I can to see that you are able to achieve whatever that you aspire to be. Hoping that I would be able to equip you to fight your fears, your pains and inhibitions. Love you always honey and sorry for losing my temper every now and then..will try and better it..I love you and I love you tons..

Terrorism & India

Terrorism effects one and all and it plays on peoples insecurity, innocent lifes and wishes to achieve instability, collateral damage in various forms. I am sure this is not something new that I write. Everyone knows what happened on 26/11 in mumbai and the recent outrage by millions of Indians in Urban India. Interestingly there are tons of debates on news channels and various other media and forums. I believe all this to make good business by fuming this very emotion, let me tell you how. Tune into any news channel and they are asking us to send our suggestions and views through SMS mind you each sms cost 6 rupees and who is making money? So are the news channels really with us or there for the money. Are we fuming anger and hatred and making remarks that we would under normal circumstances never do. I believe we are.

I am surprised at hundreds of people coming out on the Road and saying we will not pay taxes and do a lot of non-cooperation movement against the government. If you think about it we are working for the terror networks this is exactly what they want. They want to slowdown our economy and divert our focus to other things. Our taxes go to the employes in PSUs and different development projects around the country. Yes I agree that they are underutilized and misappropiated and making money for the ministers but even if 20% is coming back to the society I dont think I can risk development work in the country which is already starved by the lack of it. Also the recession around the world doesnt help. So by not paying taxes you think you are helping the country. I really do not think we can afford to stall the progress of our country. There has to be a better way than not paying taxes. We are not fighting against the govt. remember we are fighting against the inaction. We want them to work and work with accountability. How I am sure there are ways there are laws already to force these changes and if there are not than we need to fight to bring those laws.

Anger provoked US to bomb two countries without thinking, I believe, and now they are crying and we are now talking about doing the same thing. I was surprised to see online petitions and millions supporting it without realizing what they are vouching for. We are actually ok with 500 of our great soldiers to give up their lifes because we are angry and unhappy. WAR is not a solution not even targeted bombings. Rats will hide from one hole into the other. Terrorism cannot be resolved overnight. US bombed countries is the world to what good. Are we free of terrorism? Today pakistan is hiding some elements tomorrow some other countries will shield them. By bombing countries US has created a situation where the US citizens are forcefully holed up in their own country. They cannot travel without fear anywhere in the world. Do we want to end up being targets around the world and be a reason to be hated because we acted in haste.

There has to be a better ways to tackle the situation. I just hope that the Govt just to show people in India and win some votes do not act in haste and bomb some locations. While we really need to fight a diplomatic battle with Pakistan and demand them to take action we need to look at ourselves and take some measures to ensure that gullible people like us and millions in our villages are not used/mislead into doing such dirty unforgivable act.

I would support

1. Police reforms so that we can tackle situation better if it happens
2. Central Investigation agency independent of political indulgence
3. Autonomous bodies to monitor Govt. spendings and MLA spendings with authority to take action against people who are caught doing wrong.
   
4. Mandatory Social Service for all Indians irrespective of who he is from the president to the beggar on the street. If we get even 5% of our population do this we will change our country inside out.
   
5. Create a sense of equality. We are Indians. Thats all!!

Remember majority of our populations live in villages and small towns and they are worried about feeding their kids and medical help and education, clean water, basic amenities they are dealing with a very serious problem of surviving everyday. If we want to change our country and fight Terrorism in a more efficient manner I believe that we have to create the sense of belonging. I belong to India. I am an INDIAN.

I wish we are not fooled by sudden rush of blood and misleading NEWS CHANNELS. Think beyond and out of the box.

If I act happy when people around me are sad I am insensitive and selfish but if I am happy and spread happiness around me by working with the sad everyone looks upto me. We need to unite and contribute to bring the country together. Time heals the biggest wounds but anger only burns more than it cures. We need constructive action and self realization more than bombing others or not paying taxes. I am not a politician nor an economist but I do believe that there is always a better way than killing one another.

Whirlpool

Fresh like rain in the hill, drops the size of dew,
Cold & refreshing I hear myself humming,
As I brave myself in a dark valley,
This Feeling is new as if I am excited,
And scared same time in the valley dark & lonely.
Thousands of questions and innumerable images form,
As if to show what I dont want to see.
But I know at the end of it I would have braved a journey worth every bit of it,
Courage that I can never speak about, bravo that I will never receive.
Accomplishment that I am proud of and will always think and smile about.

Twists and turns like a roller Coaster,
I come across a cross road like never before,
Caught between love and parents, responsibilities unknown,
This Feeling is new as if I am excited,
And scared same time in the crowd lonely & disappointed,
Thousands of questions & innumerable images form,
As if to show what I dont want to see.
The only hope that I live with is the sweet result,
A strong and happy relation that everyone would see and speak about.

Such is the music of life,
Touching the shore like the sea,
I am sure the challenge wont be over even after this,
Destination is always as close as the next journey is.
You by my side make it easy.
The feeling is new as if I am excited,
And Scared same time..........

This is exciting times for me each day brings with it fair share of anxiety, excitement and uncertainties. I can probably never put in words how and what I go through everyday. The one and only factor that keeps me from falling apart is your love. Every time I look at you it gives me strength to go on. I have a long way to go and it wont be possible without you khushi..I love you for being with me and being there..